alone

craving for fish and chip. and here I am dine all alone by myself. rasa sgt looser

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Perkahwinan Jarak Jauh ~~!

Who said shopping is a good theraphy? or maybe part of the theraphy?
it wasnt work on me~! i mean, it wasnt works on me now, but used to. *blush*

i miss hubby badly. i know. its just the 3rd day of the week. and readers, sure all of you akan cakap "dia dah buat dah..dah buat dah perangai meroyan dia tu"
T_____T
tried to shop online untuk menghabiskan sisa-baki duit gaji. wahhahaha... duit gaji bersisa. kagum bukan?
sangat tipu. actually menghabiskan duit yg sepatutnya disimpan.
but, hati sangat kosong, jiwa sangat lara. nothing fancy or nothing can impressed me at this moment.
sadis~~!!!

I just wish i could have a place call home. i know, our kulim house consider home. what i mean here is, home whereby i balik kerja, i could be with hubby. do house chores like normal married couple yang lain setiap hari. at least cook dishes *oh! sangat menipu kot this part*, paling tidak, boleh buat breakfast for hubby every morning.

i just wish i could simpan my luggage bag inside the cupboard or away dari pandangan mata. every weekend my luggage bag is my bestie. and now, most of the time, i didnt even unpack it. coz i knew by friday i need to pack and go somewhere. eh bukan! bukan melarikan diri, but either heading up north or heading to my parent house. why shoud i unpack everything right?

i just wish i could spend my weekend in a real peace. no hurry on friday evening. take my sweet time finishing my kerja di opis.

everything seems so complicated and not in place at the moment. yes, we does argue. but not like normal married couple seperti who suppose to do the dishes? or who suppose to clean up the table after dinner?, or who suppose to do the laundry this week? we argue on, who suppose to spend the weekend at where.

exhausted is my new nickname. but i'm use to it by now. my mom,aunties and even my sis tanya "tak penat ke?" yes, penat! korang yg dengar pun sure penat. sticking your butt for 6hrs is not comfortable at all and far from enjoying it. or at least, kalau hubby was the one who suppose to travel back to central, i still need to go back to klang. another 1.5hrs drive perhaps.
ko ingat best? meh try! and alhamdulillah, we've been doing this more than 2months now and another more months to come.
badan rasa lunyai. urat sendi rasa dah tak larat. kaki rasa dah tak mampu nak melangkah.
by monday, your energy need to reach 100%. need to do full swing kerja. its monday everyone. and this company is operating 24/7 which meaning to said that saturday and sunday there will be things pending at your queue and you need to finish it.

and everything seems incomplete.
felt like boyfren and girlfrenover weekdays.
phone and sms.
and email sometimes.
does it sufficient? no! not at all.

i miss his kisses.
i miss his hugs.
i miss to listen to his stupid jokes eventhough sometime i felt like knocking his head with those jokes.
i miss to do the groceries with him.
i miss to listen to his deep breath when he was asleep.
i miss to lay down on his tummy when we watch tv.
i miss to distract his attention when he is watching football.
i miss to lay down on bed reading my novel and knowing he is next to me reading his photogrpahy book *photography ye, bukan pornograhy*.
i miss to be in his arm through the night.
and above all, i just miss every single thing about him.

p/s: weekend salu cepat je berlalu. jahat betul. sapa yang putarkan laju2 jam time weekend ni? nk ketuk tangan dia ni.

p p/s : dear my fren anne, selamat menunaikan umrah~~! selamat pergi dan balik. doakan saya ye cik anne. and nady, pls jangan nangis2 rindu anne. i'm just a phone call away =))